Feeling Guilt, Even Though I Know I Am Forgiven!!!

I learned something very important this past couple of days. As I encouraged you to read the book, The Shack, I want to say what it has done for me. I know that I am saved, and I know that I have been forgiven my sins, and I also know Jesus loves me, and the Holy Spirit is with me to guide me and comfort me. I know God created me for a purpose, out of love for me. I know if I died today I would go to Heaven to live eternally with God the Father, and Jesus the Son. I would be reunited with loved ones who have already gone to be with the Lord. Gods' word is true, all of it. You do not need to add to the Bible, and please do not take anything away from it. As humans we do not fully understand everything he tells us, or why bad things happen to his children. I just know I had some guilt from past sins that were keeping me from having the closeness to God I so desired. God forgave me of these sins when I repented of them, and ask him to forgive me, but I had never forgiven myself, or learned to get past the guilt I held deep inside of me. In the book, which is fiction, but reads like a wonderful, but sad true story, I saw God, my Father, and Jesus, my Lord and Savior, along with the Holy Spirit, my guide and comforter as 3 different, but the same being. In my imagination I do not think I could have come up with spending time with them as the writer of this story did, but I liked it. It made me smile. It made me see as so long my Lord has wanted me to see, that he is truly my best friend, and as one of his children, a born again saint, I have his love inside me. I have the ability inside me to love as he guides me too. I also may never forget the things that I did that have caused me so much shame, but I do not have to allow the sins that he died for me on that cross, and forgave me of them destroy the person he so wants me to be. I feel free this morning. I feel alive and free of the pain deep inside that kept me burdened down. I feel the Holy Spirit surrounding me with peace, and the love of God the Father, and Jesus the Son flowing through my heart and mind. For once they are in harmony, you know the thoughts in my mind and the feelings in my heart. I know I have to guard my heart, and my mind. I can do that by reading the Bible, Gods word, and praying to God. I love to write letters to God. I usually begin my prayers with Dear Jesus. Journeling my prayers has been the best thing for me, as I am a person who is easily distracted, and I can stay more focused on what I am talking to my Lord about this way. This is the day he has given me to live, just as it is the day he has given you, I pray we both can use it to further his kingdom, and follow his guidance to accomplish what he wants us to. Thank you Lord for this day, and I pray that your love shines through me for others to see.

Just Some Thoughts!!!

Sitting here thinking about the week with Keely in the hospital, I can thank God for keeping her safe. Seeing her in pain was so hard for all of us. So many times I wish I could take the pain I see my family go through, especially my Grandchildren. Last Christmas when Aubrie had the bad reaction to the medicine she was so miserable, and I wanted so bad to take that from her. I know taking Keely to Birmingham tomorrow is the best thing. I just wish I could take the pain for her. You know, I know my parents felt the same for me. I knew my Grandmother Pulley pretty good, but I don't remember much about her. Just her long grey hair, and how she always wore an apron over her dress. I am built a lot like her, I do remember she was a big built woman like me. In fact I called her Big Mamaw and my mom's mother I called Little Mamaw. She was a short lady like her daughter, my mom. I didn't spend much time with my Mom's mother, but I do remember playing the piano for her, and we would sing together. I love music so much, especially Christmas music, and songs about Jesus. When I was young the small town I lived in had this huge cedar tree growing in front of the old hotel, which they put lights all over every year, also there was a big wooden Santa with sleigh and the reindeer, including Rudolph. I think the coke company had put it up. I would walk around that Santa display and the tree singing Christmas songs every afternoon. Christmas has always been my favorite time. I really love it so much. The lights, all the colors of Christmas, the music, and celebrating Jesus birthday. The excitement on the kids faces make me smile to think about it. I just read the book, "The Purpose of Christmas", and it was a really good book. Rick Warren wrote it and he said there was 3 purposes of Christmas. The first is a time of Celebration, second- a time of Reconciliation, and last, but to me the most important- a time of Salvation. People everywhere need to think about all of them. Celebrate Christmas with family and remember that it is Jesus birthday which is the most important part of the celebration. Reconciliation, do you need to make amends with anyone? Family or friends? God? Christmas is a perfect time to reconcile with God first, his forgiveness is guaranteed. Then maybe you need to forgive someone, or ask them to forgive you. Life is much better with no conflicts in your family or with friends. I pray they will find it in their hearts to forgive you, and that you will them this Christmas. I had a friend who chose to not have anything to do with me anymore, and I am praying God will help me find a way to reconcile with her. Salvation is the most important purpose of Christmas. If you accept Jesus Christ as your personal Savior, then you will do the other two purposes for sure. I pray all who read this will find the purpose of Christmas in their heart. I pray that each of you will have a Merry Christmas with Jesus as your purpose! I know when I write I go from one topic to another, but that is my rambling brain. It is overloaded most of the times, but empty at others. So forgive me for that. Laughing here!!